The Right to Parent

When can an adoptive parent just be a parent?


China has established new guidelines for people who receive travel approval (TA) after August 1. Although we hope to have Maggie's referral by then, we probably will not have our TA by then. Therefore, we will have to abide by these new guidelines which require reports at 1 month, 2 years, 3 years and 5 years in addition to the already required 6 and 12 month post adoption reports.

Although I am raising two awesome boys, I will still have to prove to the government that I am a good parent five years after we bring Maggie home.

There is a reason for post placement reports. The government needs to know that these children they entrust to families are well taken care of. I understand that but there are times when you just want to be a normal family. I had a goal for myself that I wanted to be done with home studies and post placement reports by a certain age. With these new China guidelines, that's not going to happen. Although I love our social worker and these extended updates will give me the opportunity to continue to see her over the next several years, I just want to be a mom. I don't want to have to "prove" myself to our government or China.

As adoptive parents, we have gone through yearly physicals, CPR training, home visits with social workers, fingerprinting, criminal (passed that with flying colors!) and financial background checks, asked for letters from our priests, family and friends, etc., etc.

Can't we just be parents?